Cream In My Coffee

So, I was going to write a long detailed post about dating outside of your race/culture. And how society still frowns on it. How I cheer just a wee bit louder when I see an interracial couple together, in love and not caring what others think. My heart skips a beat when I see a white man with a black woman. I get a little giddy at that sight. I'm fascinated when I see someone of Hispanic origin with an Asian partner. No matter what the combo is, I'm always fascinated about how they met, how their families feel about it and how they deal with the potential drama that people just want to bring into their lives.

I could go on about this for hours really. So fucking fascinating! I could talk about my first major crush on a boy at school who was white with freckles even! His name was Kurt LOL Yeah, good times!! I could talk about when i asked my mom how she would feel if i married a white boy. Her answer was simple and well put, "A good man, is a good man, no matter what his race is. As long as he is a good man to you, I don't care what he is." Oh mothers...always giving sage advice that sticks with us forever! Love them!

I could go on and on about people asking me "have you ever dated a black man?" because I guess they noticed my affinity for handsome white guys. And then them being shocked that I have and have no real issues dating black guys, I just don't meet many that I would date lol And then they want me to explain to them what is the differences and why i gravitate towards one and not the other (can you see my eyes rolling?). People want to know the details of my damn dating life for some reason. They don't "get it", whatever that means. Hell, I've done full on discussions with people about the differences. Then they want to know have I dated other cultures and I have to tell them yes, I've dated lots of other cultures and they all have a story of their own. But I don't put those experiences against their whole culture. That would be stupid and ignorant...alas people do it.

I could also talk about how I've been told by many people throughout my life, "you aren't like other black girls." (can you see my eyes roll?) Well, of course I'm not! I'm just ME. There is no one else like me and there never will be. So of course I'm not like other black girls...stop making a big deal about it already. OH and don't get me started on the "I've never been with a black woman before, what's it like?" guys! OH GOOD LAWD!! I always tell them, "Neither have I". Some get it but some don't and that just makes me sad for mankind in general lol Do I want to be someone's "first black woman" experience? Depends on the guy really. The ones that just have that freaky fantasy fetish deal about it, NOPE. The guy who just hasn't met a cool awesome black chick like myself and doesn't really care about it, sure why not. I don't want to be someone's experiment or thesis. No one wants that.

Look...i just talked about all that lol

Love is Love. Like is Like. Lust is Lust. What gets you going, is your own business. My crushes and lust objects have no color lines. My friends have no color lines. What attracts me to a person isn't just whats on the outside. Its definitely about their personality. The color of their skin or background is just another layer of them. Can we compare stories of our families and things, of course we can! I love doing that! Because somewhere there is always a common thread. Do I have high expectations for different cultures? Hhhmm yes, I do. I expect much more from a black man on a different level, than I do a white man. Not to say I don't have high standards for white men either...because I definitely do lol But it's all relative really. No matter who they are, like my mama said, he has to be a good man, period. If he isn't, i don't care how sexy he is, how much money he has or anything else. If he isn't a good man, there is no point in me thinking twice about him.

It would be nice to see, in my lifetime, people stop looking at me funny when I'm out with a white guy or some other guy who isn't black. It would be nice to be treated with respect all the time, when I'm with a black guy. It would be nice to not be judged on appearances, period. Do I think this will happen in my lifetime...probably not. But do I let it get me down and hide from the world the person I'm in love with and whom loves me? Hells no! Like I tell everyone with their own choices, that make them happy...OWN IT! You like it, I love it! Own what you love, like, makes you feel good! Don't let anyone tell you otherwise!

Maybe one day, I will go into a much more detailed post about my preferences. Maybe, I will even do a podcast about it. Who knows. But it's definitely a topic I never get tired of talking/exploring/sharing. The world is full of amazing people, don't be afraid to mix things up.